Dealing with stubborn people

At some point in our life we all have encountered a stubborn person whether they were a spouse, a child, parents, sibling, co-worker, friend or a boss. We all know when dealing with stubborn people no amount of criticism is going to work. The more you criticize them the deeper they dig in even if they are wrong. Stubborn people will never admit they are wrong. The best way to get them to see the error of their ways is patiently explain to them their errors and stress there’s a better way of seeing things. And for the sake of all that is peaceful do not call their error their faults. Labeling their behavior as faults is an attack on their person and they will go into defense mode and merely shut down again and really become even more difficult to deal with.

Give them time to calm down from their belligerent hickey fit before approaching them again. For with stubborn people you can’t win an argument with them through logic. Logic means nothing to them. You can’t call them out and make them ashamed, instead they will make you ashamed to know them.

It’s best to wait until they are calm. Talk to them about something they like first and then bring up what they should do and if they still say no, ask them calmly to elaborate beyond “I don’t want to,” or “I don’t like it,” or “because I said so.” Ask them in a calm, friendly tone why they don’t like it or don’t want to do it? You may be surprised at what you may learn from their mode of thinking.

Sometimes go along with their method helps. Of course, I am not saying to proceed if it’s harmful but if it’s not harmful go along with it to let them see for themselves where the fault lies and then a reasonable person will surrender their resistance and see things your way.

Remember, I said a when dealing with a plain ol’ stubborn person. Not a narcissistic, crazy person on an ego trip. If you’re dealing with a narcissistic, crazy person on an ego trip. You might as well throw in the towel from the beginning because this kind of person is a whole different level of stubbornness. You aren’t dealing with someone emotional stable. You can talk until you are hoarse and ask as politely as you please but they aren’t going to move an inch. The only reason to continue to talking to them is that you feel like going crazy right along with them for they are already in a world where you can’t reach them. And nor does they want to be reached because in their mind… you have nothing useful to say to them. They believe you’re stupid and everything comes out of your mouth is going to be stupid. But sadly, far too many people beat their heads against the walls trying to reason with this type of person instead of letting go and moving on.

About unholypursuit

A. White, an award winning former librarian, who is also a long time member of Romantic Time and Publisher's Weekly. A. White has been writing for over fifteen years. She took classes in creative writing in college, specializing in ancient myths and legends. and later at a local community center while living in Chicago. In college she won the national contest to verbally list every country in the world, it's capital and ingenious language. Her works are mainly horror, fantasy, extreme, and sci-fi as well as, as some may says, "the truly strange predicament and puzzling." Books that I've written are "Clash with the Immortals, and eleven others which are part of the "Unholy Pursuit saga,". She has been working on the Chronicles since 2007. She wished to complete them all before introducing them to public so the readers wouldn't have to for the continuation to be written. The ideas of the book come from classic literature such as whose work greatly influence the world world such as Homer, Sophocles, Herodotus, Euripides, Socrates, Hippocrates, Aristophanes, Plato, Aristotle and many more. The "Book of Enoch" influenced the usage of Azazael as a main character and love interest. I created the primary main character from the Chronicle of Saints. I wanted to show them as real flesh and blood with thoughts, desires and yearning as any human. Not as they are so often depicted. So I created one of my own to show her as a real human that everyone can relate to.
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4 Responses to Dealing with stubborn people

  1. Dave Hurst says:

    That accurate distinguishes stubbornness from insanity.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Amanda Stevens says:

    Some people use stubbornness as a tool to manipulate people into doing what they want. It’s either “I get my way or things won’t move forward at all”. This can get old real fast. Some people behave like this every time something doesn’t go their way. They compromise on nothing. I say pacify them a time or two but if they keep it up then leave them alone and let them learn to grow up. They have a lot of growing up to do.

    On Sat, Aug 4, 2018 at 12:23 PM, The Novel: UnHoly Pursuit: Devil on my Tra

    Liked by 1 person

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