Only you can make you happy.
Originally Posted onAugust 11, 2018byunholypursuit
One of you all asked me to repost this article. Thanks for your request.

I see it all over the place. There are zillions of posts, poems, movies, books all over place of someone else making someone happy. No, they didn’t. You chose to be happy with that person from the way they treated you. Their generous treatment and kindness caused you to open your heart to their love.
Physical attraction isn’t love. It may or may not blossom into love. But if it does that’s great.
Now, the revert of their action can make you sad and cause great pain if their affection is withheld or your returned affection is abused. Yes, there’s pain but only you can decide how long you’ll hold on or cling to the pain. Only you can decide when to give it up they won’t change, and seek a new love. No one else can do that for you.
You can’t see forward in life and love constantly if you’re looking back over that which you can not change, nor return to the past and change it. Like I said in the post about time. We only have a limited number of years to exist. Why waste them on someone whom you aren’t in their heart and thoughts when you can be living your life and seeking someone who can see the love you have to give and appreciate it?
In books and movies suffering for unrequited love is romantic but in reality it is not. I have heard it said, “that a heart wants what a heart wants.” Maybe true, but the mind and body is whose doing the hurting, so, they need to tell the heart to shut up and move on. It isn’t like the person died. It’s they simply left the relationship for whatever reason.
After a break up, people often feels they aren’t lovable because of one person’s opinion. Says who that you aren’t lovable any more? Never enter a relationship solely to see yourself through the eyes of another. It’s wonderful if you find that special someone in whose face light up the moment they see you. There’s no grander feeling. But if things doesn’t work out learn to pull back not become a heart hermit refusing to love again.
If your conscious actions contributed to the breakup then be frank and honest with yourself as to why they left. You can’t say you wasn’t expecting it. You knew it would someday happen if you didn’t mend your ways. So what’s all the crying and lamentations about when you did this to yourself?
When I say only you can make you happy I am not speaking of situations beyond your control. I am strictly speaking of situations within your control. So, start making yourself happy and others will see your happiness and wants to be a part of it.
When we reflect within ourselves and balance our minds, this type of reflection will help us form a stronger self-esteem and a more realistic view of the world. The important thing is not to deceive ourselves and discard what does not allow us to be happy. Your article is very illustrative. A propitious guide to better understand our life. Greetings.
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Thank you.
I agree, “The important thing is not to deceive ourselves and discard what does not allow us to be happy.” It was written some years ago as a reply to a question asked by a reader.
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Happiness is a choice and joy is a state of the spirit and heart. Great message and reminder Alma! 😍💖🤩
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Thank you. I agree it is a choice to be happy.
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There you go girlfriend…a choice! 🤗🥂😊
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Thanks for reposting it. I found it by looking through your old posts.
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You’re welcome. Thanks for visiting and looking through my old posts. 🙂
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You are welcome. 🙂
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Yes, happiness is a choice. Nice article.
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I sincerely believes it’s a choice and a gift.
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Great message Alma and nice to meet you. Thanks for stopping in. ❣️
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It’s nice to meet you too. Thank you for dropping by and thanks for your comment.
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Thanks so much! You’re most welcome❣️
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The same to you. ❣️ 🙂
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🙏🙏💕
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Thanks. 🙂 🙏🙏
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💕❤️💕
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Their treat can cause you to love them as it can equally cause you to leave them.
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Yes, treatment can cause you to love someone or leave them.
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I say circumstances in life furcate happiness more so than choice.
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I agree life’s circumstance can fork into happiness moreso than a deliberate choice. But most people doesn’t even realize they made a conscious decision to be happy, it just happens and they enjoy it. And when I say this I don’t mean people going through trying times in life. I was referring to people who aren’t suffering anything that life demands. Not those suffering from want of food, shelter or clothing. Not those suffering from illnesses.
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Wonderful post Hadley but happiness is multidimensional concept and it’s solely depends on your inner attitude, perception and many others factors.
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I think it depends upon the person’s place in life and situations in life as to whether they are in a place to be happy. I will admit I hate the modern day assumption that people must be happy all the time or something is wrong with them. That’s so unrealistic.
Let’s suppose a person is going through some difficult times in life. Naturally, they are not going to be happy. Happiness is not something one can simply decide to be. Sometimes life situations don’t allow happiness.I say let happiness come in its own time. Don’t try to force it. It’s okay not to be happy sometimes.
On Wed, Nov 2, 2022 at 10:22 AM
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Thank you Alisha, maybe I didn’t make myself clear. Sorry. I wasn’t speaking of people going through trying times in life. I was referring to people who aren’t suffering anything that life demands. Not those suffering from want of food, shelter or clothing. Not those suffering from illnesses.
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I got ya. I pointed it out because so many people go around saying this and have no idea what it means. It’s usually the privileged who go around saying this. The worst time I’ve heard people tell someone this is after a tragic has struck. That is so thoughtless.
On Thu, Nov 10, 2022 at 1:08 AM
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Unfortunately, insensitive people are always saying such a thing.I hope whomever it was said to, ignored them.
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